Get to Heaven Keep the Seven

Everybody wants spirituality. To be a good person means to walk in G-d's ways. How does that translate to reality? The only guidebook to spirituality that has stood the test of time is the Hebrew Bible. The Bible says that the Jews will be a light onto the nations. But if you are not a born Jew, you have to convert, which is not so easy!! If you do convert, it is a lot of work to be a Jew (three times a day prayer, keeping kosher, observing the Sabbath).

This blog will show you how to be Jewish without the work!!

Sunday, February 18, 2018

You have to say No to things you dont want to attain the things that you do want

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Yehuda Lave, Spiritual Advisor and Counselor

You have to say No to things you dont want to attain the things that you do want. I was told this by a wise healer tonight, but I also no you have to Yes to things that G-d send you. It is a delicate balance.

Love Yehuda Lave

Oprah's qualifications to be President

 

Hi, I'm Oprah.

 

I'm the spokesperson for Weight Watchers but can't control my weight. 

 

I tell you how to run your marriage but I can't commit to marriage. 

 

I tell you how to raise your kids but I don't have any. 

 

I am very spiritual, but don't go to any church or identify as Christian. 

 

Even though I knew about Weinstein and the casting couch, I was silent, but I support the Me Too movement. 

 

I am a black racist to the core, but blacks can't really be racist, so that doesn't count. 

 

I'm black and female, so I check all the boxes. 

 

I praised Denmark for their Socialism, though I am a billionaire due to Capitalism, the economic system that allowed a dirt-poor child from Mississippi to rise to world-renowned fame and wealth. 

 

The first time I openly endorsed a presidential candidate it was a black one, Obama. 

 

Before a black candidate, I was not political. 

 

Vote for me, and I will give you transformational change, the kind you got from Obama, my candidate and my president.

 

Balad of the green berets Barry Sadler

52 Years Ago, This Was One of The Biggest Songs All Across The Nation.

Jimmy Dean talks with Sgt Barry Sadler about his tour in Vietnam, and how he feels about the Draft Dodgers. Then Barry sings

Sgt Barry Sadler - Ballad of The Green Beret

To All The Guys... Just letting you know that the book, "Understanding Women", is now out in paperback.

32 Strange Things to get your mind off politics....

 

  1. A rat can last longer without water than a camel.

 

  1. Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks or it will digest itself.

 

  1. The dot over the letter "i" is called a tittle.

 

  1. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuously from the bottom of the glass to the top.

 

  1. A female ferret will die if it goes into heat and cannot find a mate.

 

  1. A duck's quack doesn't echo. No one knows why.

 

  1. A 2 X 4 is really 1-1/2" by 3-1/2".

 

  1. During the chariot scene in "Ben Hur," a small red car can be seen in the distance (and Heston's wearing a watch).

 

  1. On average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents daily! (That explains a few mysteries).

 

  1. Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.

 

  1. Because metal was scarce, the Oscars given out during World War II were made of wood.

 

  1. The number of possible ways of playing the first four moves per side in a game of chess is 318,979,564,000.

 

  1. There are no words in the dictionary that rhyme with orange, purple and silver.

 

  1. The name Wendy was made up for the book Peter Pan.There was never a recorded Wendy before.

 

  1. The very first bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin in World War II killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.

 

  1. If one places a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death. (Who was the sadist who discovered this??)

 

  1. Bruce Lee was so fast that they actually had to s-l-o-w film down so you could see his moves. That's the opposite of the norm.

 

  1. The first CD pressed in the US was Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA."

 

  1. The original name for butterfly was flutterby.

 

  1. The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.

 

  1. The first product Motorola started to develop was a record player for automobiles.At that time, the most known player on the market was Victrola, so they called themselves Motorola.

 

  1. Roses may be red, but violets are indeed violet.

 

  1. By raising your legs slowly and lying on your back, you cannot sink into quicksand.

 

  1. Celery has negative calories. It takes more calories to eat a piece of celery than the celery has in it to begin with.

 

  1. Charlie Chaplin once won third prize in a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest.

 

  1. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.

 

  1. Sherlock Holmes NEVER said, "Elementary, my dear Watson."

 

  1. An old law in Bellingham, Washington, made it illegal for a woman to take more than three steps backwards while dancing!

 

  1. The glue on Israeli postage is certified kosher.

 

  1. The Guinness Book of Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from public libraries.

 

  1. Astronauts are not allowed to eat beans before they go into space because passing wind in a spacesuit damages them.

 

  1. Bats always turn left when exiting a cave!

 

SEE.....NOW WASN'T THAT CALMING AND NICE FOR A CHANGE?............

PragerU: "Who Will Google Silence Next?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=giNJwXiktZ0&feature=em-subs_digest

Ah, Winter in 2018...

 

 

A little bit funny and a little bit scary.  

--

 

 

What a morning...

 

8:00 I made a snowman.

 

8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

 

8:15 I made a snow woman.

 

8:17 The nanny of the neighbours complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest.

 

8:20 The gay couple living nearby grumbled that it could have been two snowmen instead.

 

8:25 The vegans at No. 12 complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

 

8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

 

8:31 The Muslim gent across the road wants the snow woman to wear a headscarf.

 

8:40 Someone calls the cops who show up to see what's going on.

 

8:42 I am told that the broomstick of the snowman needs to be removed because it could be used as a deadly weapon. Things get worse after I mutter : "Yeah, if it's up your a***"

 

8:52 My phone is seized and thoroughly checked while I am blindfolded and flown to the police station in a helicopter.

 

9:00 I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist bent on stirring up trouble at this sensitive time.

 

9:10 I am asked if I have any accomplices.

 

9:29 ISIS just claimed responsibility...

See you tomorrow

Love Yehuda Lave

Rabbi Yehuda Lave

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