JFK-Just for Kiddish no longer People have short memories. Only shortly before Covid started, the sanctity of the synagogue as a safe place had been lost. There was the attack in Philadelphia, and in San Diego with gunman walking in and murdering Jews in prayer. To get rid of the idea that it only happens outside of Israel, in 2014 some local Arabs walked into a synagogue in Har Nof (part of central Jerusalem--not over the green line- right in the center of Western Jerusalem), and hacked five people to death. The synagogue that had always been a safe place was no longer. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that if you want to find some Jews to attack, all you have to do is find a synagogue. G-d had always put enough control into those who wanted to attack us to consider the synagogue holy, attacks in synagogues was not a regular part of modern life. It was not the attacks that brought the end to the Synagogues. It was Covid. Synagogues may never regain their central roles in our lives. The vitality of Jewish cultural and religious centers has dramatically waned and will probably never return.. Jewish community leaders have always struggled to be relevant, to engage and to attract followers, participants, parishioners. No one saw COVID coming. No one would have imagined the changes and the damage that would ensue. COVID has ravished our community. We will survive. Through creativity and caring, our religious community and cultural leaders can help us not only survive but thrive. They need us – and we need them. People, not just Jewish people, enjoy socializing with like-minded people. It's what happened at water coolers before most workplaces became remote workplaces.It's what happened in the bible when all the patriarchs met their wife's at the wells. It's what happened after work when restaurants and bars were open and social distancing never entered our minds, let alone ruled our lives. It's what happened after prayers at a kiddish, at bars and mitzvahs, and at annual fundraising galas and dinners. Jews enjoyed going to temples and to synagogues more for the camaraderie and the social scene than for the spiritual spin it added to their lives. They enjoyed seeing and being seen. Social interaction was the number-one reason people attended synagogues, Next in reasons for attending came prayer and to hear their rabbi's sermons. Most of us who go to synagogue to pray smiled when the congregation doubled a half our before the kiddish. We knew that the people were coming to the shul, JFK (just for kiddish). Jews yearn for and thrive on community. It is our sense of community that lends support and connection to something bigger than ourselves. Community gives us a sense of safety and purpose, or it did, once upon a time. COVID changed everything. We can pretend, we can do our best to replicate the real experience, but Zooming is not congregating. Limiting our time together as a group, is the antithesis of congregating. Drive-by simchas, festivities, especially do not allow for congregating. We are no longer congregating.Synagogues and temples are, by definition, congregations. That is how the Hebrew term for the word synagogue actually translates. Beit Knesset means "place where one congregates," and "synagogue" is the Greek translation of that term. Those hardest hit by the changes to our traditional synagogue model, changes wrought by COVID, have been the elderly. The irony of it all is that the elderly who now have the time to go to synagogue and attend prayer services without rushing have no services to attend, no programs in which to participate, no classes to choose from and no kiddish to enjoy. Never underestimate the importance of kiddish They are themselves a community, now a fractured community. They are the community that is at highest risk from COVID. They are the group of men and women who once made up the backbone of attendees in daily prayer services, communal programs and activities in synagogues. Today they are the people most loathe and fearful of going out to group functions and, often, most illiterate and least adroit in computer use. They are the least likely to partake of the fake communal experience we have integrated into our lives called Zooming. And the kiddish! Will it ever return? Will the congregation become a congregation again. Will we be able to safely congregate without first the unseen virus attacking us and then the world of anti-Semites seeing an opportunity to murder Jews when they are together. Before Covid started, many Jews both in Israel and outside the land, started to carry. Guns that is. Now with short services and no kiddishes there have been less news of attacks. Maybe that is the good side of the temporary to end to our congregations, but lets hope we can look back on both of these negative experiences as just a bad memory. Here's to you -La-Chaim! With the Lock downs, many young mothers are driven crazy stuck at home like this one! Playpen Party Shifra was starting to get a little stir crazy with her three young kids all under the age of 4. She complained to her best friend Miriam, "I'm getting no rest! They're driving me crazy!" "What you need," said Miriam, "is a playpen." So Shifra bought a playpen. A few days later, Miriam called to ask how things were going. "Amazing! I can't believe it," Shifra said. "I get in that pen with a good book and a chocolate bar, and the kids don't bother me for hours!" Yehuda Lave Yehuda Lave is an internationally known speaker, lecturer, journalist, author, psychologist, rabbi, spiritual teacher, and life coach, with degrees in business, psychology, Jewish and American Law. His motto: Remember, it only takes a moment to change your life. Learn to have all the joy in your life that you deserve!!! Subscribe to his free daily blog by sending an email to YehudaLave@gmail.com |
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